Oh the Joys of Married Life

Hello everyone! Man...it has been forever since I posted. I apologize. I was waiting for my wedding pictures so I could do a big wedding/honeymoon post but that nots going to happen for a little while. Oh well. In the meantime, I need to get on with the posts and share some cool stuff with you!

I saw a quote today that made me grin. For those of you check my Facebook status and Twitter you already know what it is...but for those who haven't, here is the quote:

"There is nothing quite as sexy as a man who loves his wife. Every woman in the room wants to be her."

(These were my suprise for our one month anniversary)

I can definitely say that I am very loved by my husband. He means the world to me, and I know that I mean the world to him. I'm not trying to make you jealous! I'm just bragging... :)

But seriously, I don't think any one could have prepared me for the feelings you develop after you're married to the right man, at the right time, at the right place. The temple sealing itself was incredibly powerful. Being married to the best man in the world (sorry ladies, he just is) and living, learning, working, and sharing a sacred form of physical intimacy with him creates a closeness that I have never been able to imagine. He is my other half.

Now, for our other adventures. Riley got a job! He got a couple of them actually. Right now he's working at BYU Laundry with his old mission companion Tommy and his brother Tanner. He also just started training as customer support for Ancestry.com. Can I just say I'm super excited about the latter? I love doing family history and I'm pretty much hooked to that website now.

Our apartment is looking fabulous! We finally have everything all put up and together. It feels like home and we absolutely love it.

So those are the main updates. My birthday is on Monday so Riley is taking me on a big date tomorrow. I'm so excited!

Have a super day!

The Best Thing For Our Relationship

Due to recent events with some friends of mine, I have to decided to share what I believe is the best thing that happened in mine and Riley's relationship. Hopefully it will help some of you out, will be entertaining, or at the very least will be something for me to reference back to when I'm feeling particularly frustrated about a situation.

The best thing we have done is that we've learned how to COMMUNICATE. Not just talk to each other, but have learned how we react to situations and why we react the way we do. Granted, Riley and I keep finding totally new situations to both of us so it's an adventure. The important thing is to talk about how you want something said or handled and why.

To help us get started with this process we actually took a couple of quizzes that helped a lot. The first one was the 5 Love Languages Assesment (you can google it and it will come up). Even though Riley and I are very similiar with our languages, we were able to better understand why certain things were important to us.

For example, it really bothers me when people are late, and I mean it REALLY bothers me. I can handle 5-10 minutes but when it creeps up to 15-30 minutes late and you are that late consistently I will be upset. Riley would be that late all the time and he couldn't understand why it would bother me so much. After we took the assesment we learned that my primary love language is Quality Time. After talking about it for a bit Riley understood that when he is late I'm upset because it takes away my time from him. Since then he has been a star in that area, making sure that he leaves when he needs to and texts or calls me when he is running late so I know.

The other quiz that we took was the 5 Languages of Forgiveness. This one was a definite eye opener for me. It turns out that I feel that you should apologize and then make up for it somehow. That's a struggle because I don't know how someone can make things up to me. Riley on the other hand just wants to be apologized to. It doesn't really matter how as long as it's done.

Even though these assesments did help us understand each other a lot more, we still had/have our bumps. The thing that was the absolute hardest to do and has been the most effective was our first conversation on how we react when we're upset. Not that we're upset with each other all of the time, but that conversation made it easier to talk about how we communicate in every situation; not just when we're upset.



Now for the hardest part...you have to be COMPLETELY honest with each other on how you're feeling and be COMPLETELY open about it. This is very hard to do, especially for me. When I get upset or feel like I want to explain something I tend to get quiet. My initial response is to suck it up and deal with it. There are certain times where that is the right response, but not when it comes to discussing things with someone you're in a relationship with.

Riley had a hard time dragging things out of me. What he would do to help me is ask me specific questions. Questions are good, but when they're vague you aren't going to get anywhere. Asking, "how are you feeling?" is way too generic. The question, "why are feeling that way?" is a lot more effective. The response, "I don't know" is ok. Now you both has something to discuss and discover.

After you learn these things about each other you have to understand that BOTH of you have to make sacrifices. There are certain things you'll have to do for each other and compromise on. The best way I can explain this is by one of mine and Riley's experiences.

Here is some background information first. When Riley is upset or concerned about something, he has to talk about it right then and have some form of physical contact with me. When I am upset I want to talk about after I have some time to calm down and think it over and I am not ok with any form of physical contact.

Once we talked about how we reacted and the reasons for it, we were able to make it easier for both us to discuss things. When we are having a serious discussion Riley gives me some time to think about it. What I do is make sure that I'm holding his hand or something like that. They are little changes but it has made a world of difference for every conversation we have.

Thanks for bearing with me! I know I have A LOT more to learn, but I'm very grateful that Riley and I are off to a good start. I am incredibly lucky to have found such a wonderful man. He is patient, ambitious, spiritual, hard-working, and very willing to make sacrifices and take the time to understand me. I love him so much. 11 DAYS!!!

Have a noteworthy day!

The Fire Alarm Deception

12 days to go! I'm not panicking though because I'm in surreal mode. I'm fairly certain this isn't really happening...the idea is just too weird. I'm sure I'll get back in panic mode next week or something. But for right now I'm just kind of like, "What? I'm getting married next week? Pssh...whatever. You're joking."



This last week has been a lot of fun. Riley and I were able to go to our apartment and get it all cleaned up and painted. It needed it badly. We got very lucky though. It's at a great location and it really is a cute place, but apparently the last 25 people who lived there didn't know how to clean. Plus, one of the couples had painted the room this mint green color, and not a good mint green. Riley explains it as Easter candy green. I don't know about you but that would totally keep me awake at night.

So we cleaned the place, painted the bedroom a much better shade of green, and painted the living room a nice gray on the top part (there is a baseboard that runs through the middle of the wall) and the bottom part a nice off white.

One of the other things about the apartment was that it has a fire alarm and carbon monoxide detector. When Riley went to get a nail out of the wall he took the fire alarm off and there was nothing in it...literally. It was the case of the fire alarm. That was super comforting. We got a new one at Wal Mart but seriously? The Carbon Monoxide detector is fine though so I'm glad about that.

Other than cleaning and painting we were able to get all of the furntiure moved in so that was nice. Now Riley is in Delaware at his old mission and their family is picking up Tanner on Wednesday! That's exciting. Riley is loving it. He is seeing a lot of his converts and the friends he made on his mission. I'm glad that he has the opportunity to do that.

On Friday I got to go to dinner with McCall at Texas Roadhouse. That was so fun, I like having one on one time with her. Plus it was Texas Roadhouse. That is the best restaurant EVER! Just so you all know.

We also got to check out the Bridesmaid dresses. They are coming along splendidly! Marissa is doing an excellent job, I can't wait to see the final result. AH! So excited!

Have a super day!

Initiating Panic Mode

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH   * Deep Breath* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

24 DAYS! Only 24 days left. I cannot believe it. I'm so used to saying a month or two but now we're down to weeks! I am so excited but totally freaking out. We have so much done but there is so much more to do.  Ah...I'm freaking out. Hopefully typing it all out will help me get some of this nervous energy burned off.

 

I  had my Bridals done! I've got to tell you, it's a pain trying to figure out which ones I want to keep. My photographer is amazing! She posted a few on her blog. Here is the link if you want to check them out!

http://www.kristinacurtisphotography.com/2012/05/28/kaili-riley-groomals/

I had my Bachelorette Party on the 26th and that was a blast. I love my friends! It was really fun with a good mix of awkwardness. It's kind of weird to have married friends my age but they had some good advice about a lot of different things.

The following Sunday my friend Kellie gave her farewell talk! It was a mini missionary week! Kellie gave her homecoming talk and left for the MTC that Wednesday and my friend Derek came home from his mission that Tuesday. I went with McCall as moral support. It was really cool to see Derek though. It's sad to see friends leave but awesome to see them when they come back!

 

Riley and I also, officially, have an apartment! We got the contract signed and now we're just deep cleaning and painting the place. I'll post before and after pictures once it's all done. I'm really excited that we have our own place! It will take a while to clean and fix up a little but it's great! We love it.

Other than that Riley and his family are heading out to New York soon to go pick up Tanner. I'm excited to meet my future brother-in-law, although I'll miss Riley while he's gone. Lori is hosting another Bridal Shower for me, which is super nice of her, and life is just moving by really fast. I can't believe there are only 24 days left until I become Mrs. Spear (weird!) but I'm excited for when that day comes.

Have a whimsical day!

Crunch Time

This weekend was pretty good. I got to babysit my cousins, meet Kelsie's boyfriend, celebrate Mother's Day with my mom, talk to Tanner, who is my future brother-in-law, ate dinner with the Spears, and had a very nice evening with Riley. Even though the weekend was pretty busy the ending was quite relaxing.

Riley also made this incredibly cute video... :) it made me very happy. I love him immensely! Here is the video.

Now for the rest of the week. Bridals are next Thursday! Time just flies by...yesterday we went to the printers and designed the announcements; we'll be proofing them tomorrow. Mom is going to the reception center today to see the basic set up that we'll be having. Last week we got the tuxes!!! Riley is such a stud. He looked so handsome. I'm excited to see the dad's and groomsmen as well. Everyone is just going to look sharp!

Other than that I'm trying to figure out what I'm doing with my hair and make-up. I know who is doing it I just don't know WHAT I'm doing with it...which is stressing me out because Bridals are next week so I kind of need to know what I'm doing. Here is a basic idea of what I would like to do with my hair. What do you think?

There would be some alterations but I think it looks beautiful! Also, we're picking up my dress from Alterations on Thursday and going to our floral consulation. We're just hammering everything out this week! Next week is Bridals and the Bachelorette Party. Fun times.

Have a glorious day!

How Lucky Am I?

50 MORE DAYS! 50 more days and I will be sealed for time and all eternity to Riley. I am so excited! Planning the wedding is fun and everything but what I am looking forward to the most is being with this wonderful man forever. I love you, Riley.

I'm very grateful. I'm grateful for my amazing friends from all over! Yesterday my friend Jaclynn and Catherine (who is getting married next week!!!) came over. So we had those two lovely girls and the amazing Nora so that was a lot of fun. It felt like a partial Southern Virginia University reunion. I'm very glad I was able to go to school there. It was one of the most beautiful places in world. It was also a place where I grew up A LOT.

My friends here in Utah are incredible as well. I can not express just how awesome my Maid of Honor is. McCall is incredible. She is so on top of things and really is doing her best to help me out any way she can. All of my friends have offered to help and everytime I asked for something or just want to talk about things they are always right there for me.

How lucky am I? Ridiculously lucky. I'm lucky to have the job that I have and that I get to work for a company with a mission to change peoples' lives.  So lucky that I get to be sealed to such an amazing man, so lucky that I have loving and loyal friends, and blessed to have a family who is helping me prepare for the wedding and learn everything I can to be ready for marriage.

Look around you today! See what blessing you have and all the good things happening in your life! There is so much love and support around us that it is difficult to see unless we look for it.

Have a blessed day!

My Eyes Be Poppin!

I'm pretty sure a handful of you are reading this so you can understand what is up with the weird title of this post. I promise that this is not totally random! First of all, I'm curious to see how much the title effects the amount of views on my blog, and second, my eyes look fabulous!

I got eyelash extensions yesterday! While Riley, Lori, and I were looking for tuxes (Riley looks incredibly attractive in tuxes...fyi) Lori asked if I was going to get false eyelashes or eyelash extensions for Bridals and the wedding. I hadn't even thought of that! I started looking up prices online and I found this really good deal. At Salon on the Avenue in Provo, Kenzie is having a deal this week where she'll give you a full set of eyelash extensions for $45. You may think that's too pricey, but trust me, I was looking everywhere and this was the best deal by far.

Also getting the extensions was probably the most relaxing thing I've done in awhile. I know that sounds weird but it really was very nice. We went in a nice warm room, I was laying down on a comfy table, listening to good music, and I had my eyes closed the whole time. I even fell asleep! I'll put up pictures of my eyelashes in a little while but my phone is terrible at taking pictures so I'll have to get a legitimate camera to give you an idea of what it looks like.

Riley is recovering from his surgery very well. We even did a double date on Tuesday. That was a blast! One of Riley's neighbors stopped by his house that day and said they had 4 free tickets to the Bee's baseball game for that night. Riley took them and so after I got back from teaching my kids we went to Zupa's and then met Ashley and Tom at the stadium to watch the game. I'm not the biggest baseball fan but that really was fun! Thanks again for the amazing date, Riley!

I have a question...Riley and I put together a team for The Dirty Dash. It's a 5K that is going on in Miday on September 22. It actually looks really fun. It's not just running, they have obstacles all along the way and you get COVERED in mud. I just really don't want to train for it...at all. Riley understands me so we did early registration. When I said that we would wait this was his response, "Kaili, we need to register for it now because you'll actually train and not back out later since it has already been paid for." He knows me too well.

Do any of you lovely people who know how to train for marathons of any length? I understand that we need to run, but other than that is there anything that helps you prepare for it? Thanks!

Have a awe-inspiring day!